Wednesday, July 4, 2012

Hope’s 2nd Birthday!

birthday collage

Happy 2nd Birthday my sweet Hope Lynn! It was a good birthday party with 7 children in attendance (including Noah and Eden) and 7 adults (including Eric and I). So 14 bodies in the house for Hope to process. She did fairly well until about 45 minutes before everyone left. But that will come later in the post. She didn’t like her birthday cupcake I got her and pushed it away…far away. But when we started passing out slices of cake…well that was a different story. Now she didn’t want to actually eat it mind you but she did want to touch it and then fed it to both Eric and I. She got her hand all messy and we got some pictures so I was happy. And really isn’t that what this day was all about…me being happy?! The cake she won’t can’t eat, presents she doesn’t know how to open,  people that she doesn’t know that will likely freak her out later and decorations she doesn’t understand…clearly it was all about staging an event to preserve for posterity. We did that, so yay for us. I have great friends and family and I was glad they came to celebrate. Hope got some gifts she really liked and some new clothes. Eden loved the cake, loved the decorations and loved opening helping Hope open her gifts. By far the coolest gift was one that Mommy picked up at Target for my sweet girl. It is a musical instrument of bells. It is melodious and colorful and fun!

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How fun is that toy?! So the party came and went and I was able to get Hope down for a nap and I rested some myself. I was very out of sorts this day and I can’t really explain why. I was stressed on behalf of Hope and on my behalf. I could feel her anxiety level slowly increase throughout the party even though she didn’t show any visible signs of stress. She does exactly what Dr. Chambers said she would do, she works out her attachment issues in silence and they will come out at night. And boy howdy did they that night and the next day. It was just too big a week for this little darling. IAC appointment, errand day, play date at the park and we ended with birthday party. Too much in one week.

I also could not stop thinking of  Hope’s biological parent’s; especially her Mother. I know that whatever her feelings were about Hope be they positive or negative, there was no way she would not be thinking of Hope on this day; the day she gave birth to a little girl and then said goodbye to her. Sigh. Yuck. I pray that the Holy Spirit would find a way to this woman’s heart and give her peace about the daughter she will never know. I am thankful for Hope’s biological parents this day; because out of their suffering and difficult decision came our special blessing and joy. We started a tradition that I read about in one of my international adoption books where we light candles for Hope’s biological parents and remember them, as Hope gets older she can add candles for Eric and I if she wants or any other special person in her life.We are all going to do it on each of our birthdays. So for my birthday this coming up week, I will light candles for my parents and we will talk about them. We want the tradition to be one that the whole family can share. You can see them floating in water in a bowl in the collage. It was a good day and I’m glad we had the party.

1 comment:

  1. I am cracking up about the party being all about you! And I love the candle tradition. I'm pretty sure I will forget that idea, but it is great!
    And I love her H bib ;)

    Happy Birthday Hope!

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